This is not an easy movie to watch. In fact, it is probably one of the most heartbreaking movies I have ever seen.

But I had to include it here because there is something about it that feels painfully real.

A lot of movies about tragedy eventually give you some kind of redemption. The character suffers, breaks down, slowly heals, and by the end you are allowed to leave the cinema feeling at least a little better.

Manchester by the Sea does not really give you that.

Major spoilers from here

There are two scenes in this movie that I still remember very clearly, even years after watching it.

The first is the police station scene.

Lee is being questioned after the fire, and the whole thing is almost strangely calm. The police talk to him, explain what happened, and eventually tell him that he is free to go. And then, only a few seconds later, he grabs an officer’s gun and tries to shoot himself.

I don’t think I even want to write much more about that scene. Watching it says enough.

The other one is the encounter between Lee and Randi on the street.

There is nothing particularly dramatic about where it happens. They simply run into each other and start talking, which somehow makes the scene even worse.

Randi tries to apologize for the things she said to him after the accident. She tells him that her heart is broken and that she knows his is broken too. Lee can barely even answer her.

Lee: There’s nothin’ there.

That line is probably enough to explain Lee better than a long analysis ever could.

Because this is where a normal movie could have given us the big emotional reconciliation. They still care about each other, Randi is crying, Lee is clearly still carrying everything with him. It would have been very easy to let them hug and give the audience some relief.

But he just cannot do it.

And later, when Patrick tries to convince him that they can make things work, Lee says something even simpler:

“I can’t beat it.”

I think that might be the thing I remember most about Manchester by the Sea. Not everyone “beats” what happened to them. Sometimes people continue living, they laugh occasionally, they love people, they find ways to get through the day, but there are some things that do not disappear just because enough time has passed.

It is a horrible thought.

And probably one of the reasons this movie is so good.